Motivation, where does it go?

[Will_B]

Hey guys, I'm not too well known around here so forgive me for intruding. For months I've sort of been laying stagnant, with no real goal or aim as to where I want to be or what I want to do with myself. I want to get into the video game industry in the long run, but I'd like to talk about motivation.

Every now and then I get sudden bursts of motivation, ideas start flying, I start planning, visualising. Then when it actually comes to doing something, i.e, opening a level editor/blank canvas, I suddenly feel like my motivation balloon just popped, so I'm left holding onto a limp piece of string. I then start worrying, perhaps this isn't for me any more, maybe I should just pack it in. And usually what follows this is loss of thought direction and creativity. Yet somehow I still have this tiny flame within me that burns for level design. Its a vicious cycle, with me

I'd like to ask those still reading, how often to you have periods of de motivation, what usually causes it, how do you see past it? Your answer doesn't have to be about games or modding at all, just anything in general. Perhaps I'm asking on the wrong part of the internet, but I thought Id share my thoughts with you here as I'm assuming most of you are the creative types, so perhaps you come across similar hurdles.

Thank you for any input, it would be great to hear from you.

[zombie@computer]

I'm almost always unmotivated. The only things that motivate me are basically friends asking me to do stuff and, well, basically forcing myself to start with things (even if i dont like to). Once started i usually can go on for an hour or so.

[Text_Fish]

All creatives face this issue -- it's 'writers block'. The only way to combat it is regular excercize, so when you're not currently going through one of your enthusiastic periods putting energy in to a specific project you need to do regular, small amounts of excersize such as sketches, short stories or experimenting with brushwork.

Once you've aquired a skill it's not yours to keep forever unless you make a point of hanging on to it. If you only flex your creative muscles when inspiration strikes you'll often find you have to relearn various skills which only increases the chance of creative burnout or distraction.

My prefered technique is to regularly find and follow small tutorials online, that way I'm staying creatively active and potentially learning new skills. The results are usually fairly derivative but it keeps the skills ticking over and sometimes it's even the catalyst for a bigger idea.

[Hollow]

Very well explained Text. It's something even people of immense talent go through. those creative splurges of inspiration and the downtime of inactivity. I used to go through that alot and never finished maps. The only solution for me was planning everything in advance as best as you can. Locations, themes, references, layouts, anything you can think of. Also set small personal goals, doing this means regardless of whether you're in that creative mood, you have something to work too, even if its small steps.

But when you do get that energy and inspiration, moderate it. You WILL burn out, if you attempt to bulldoze through everything in a day or two. If you keep a steady pace of working on something say, every other night, it means you have that necessary time away to enjoy other things to keep your mood up (read a book, watch a film etc).

One thing recently I've noticed is that I concentrate a lot better when I have some background sound. Not sure why, but music that keeps a steady progressive beat, or some sort of long dialogue, seems to focus my attention on my work, rather than getting distracted. I think it's because If I have nothing playing, the lulls in sound mean that my brain starts wandering. Haha, that might just be me, but I'd be interested if that works for anyone else.

[Performante]

Hi friend, I know exactly what you're going through as I've been through it many times before. It can be a very difficult situation because you know how to succeed at so many things, but when it comes to actually doing them, you fall short and can't focus.

One thing you should be thankful for is that you have plenty of ideas - you are creative. However, I can tell you from my own experience of having a creative imagination that not all of these ideas will work in the long run. Keep a notepad with you and jot down your ideas. Before you start creating your ideas, evaluate them. As a designer, you should never be afraid to throw away good or bad ideas - you want the ideas that make the most sense.

Think of the design process as a tree. You start with the root idea, then build in small fragments toward your end product. I can tell you from my earlier experience as a designer that far too often I would come up with not just an idea, but an entire "plan" as to what I want my idea to become - all inside my head. Then, when I sit down in front of my computer to start the actual design process - I just don't know where to start. Although several contributing factors helped me out of this phase, I'll tell you some of the things that may be most relevant to you, as a designer.

Start with a blank piece of paper and sketch an outline of what you want your game level to look like, but leave the details for later. Videogames are complex, and just like constructing a building, it is much more efficient to plan as much as possible before construction to avoid costly and timely problems down the road. Once you have a basic sketch, start filling in details. Once you are satisfied with your sketch, go ahead and fire up your editor and start designing. Design in phases - for example, design your entire brushwork or basis for the level, then move on to texturing, interactive features, and so on, all while referring back to your original sketch. Although it can be tempting to design complete rooms to perfection before finishing the basis for the whole map, it often leads to the dead end thought process you are describing.

Take breaks. Videogame design is immersive and it is easy to get caught up in your never ending string of ideas. Do a short workout, go for a walk, have a bite to eat, and socialize. These things will all help keep your mind at a level state. Too much of any one thing is never good.

Find inspiration. Ideas come from inspiration, usually from several different sources. Watch a film, play a videogame, listen to music, walk around your city with a camera and take pictures, read a book. Without inspiration, ideas would be nothing.

UNDERSTAND that every designer will hit a dead end eventually. It is completely normal. Just like writers have writer's block, designers have designer's block. Although a design idea can sometimes be all you can think about, realize that this isn't necessarily a good thing.

Here is an excerpt from a book on architectural design that I'd like to share with you:

Being process-oriented, not product-driven, is the most important and difficult skill for a designer to develop.

Being process-oriented means:

1. Seeking to understand a design problem before chasing after solutions;

2. Not force-fitting solutions to old problems onto new problems;

3. Removing yourself from prideful investment in your projects and being slow to fall in love with your ideas;

4. Making design investigations and decisions holistically (that address several aspects of a design problem at once) rather than sequentially (that finalize one aspect of a solution before investigating the next);

5. Making design decisions conditionally - that is, with the awareness that they may or may not work out as you continue toward a final solution;

6. knowing when to change and when to stick with the previous decisions;

7. Accepting as normal the anxiety that comes from not knowing what to do;

8. Working fluidly between concept-scale and detail-scale to see how each informs the other;

9. Always asking "What if . . . ?" regardless of how satisfied you are with your solution.

I hope this helps, friend. Feel free to message me anytime if you want to chat. I've been in your exact situation and know how difficult it can seem, but I know you will find the true passion and drive you are looking for.

[Will_B]

Wow, thanks guys I really appreciate your input and advice. Text_Fish, I've been doing something similar lately, following different little tutorials but even doing that can sometimes be difficult. The same goes for setting personal goals, its so easy to say ' right i want to do X in Z about of time' but actually doing it takes so much more.

I learnt the hard way that storming though work for hours and hours a day burns you out, mentally and physically.

Performante thank you for your support here. I have recently done what you suggested with notepads so I can get all my idea's down on paper. However sometimes the lack of motivation comes from lack of ideas! I will try follow your advice, and try to adjust my thought patterns.

Thanks again guys, I hope more of you can share your experiences.

[Jangalomph]

Adding on to what others have said. Just make small scenes of ideas, and maybe one day they'll for something as a whole.




Arm mod I made:

As you do stuff like that, you'll learn alot of things and you may even create some sort of amazing portfolio piece that started out as a random thought.
All of that above is just fooling around with what ever I had and trying to gain some sort of higher inspiration from quite some time ago.

[nub]

It's pretty much been a downward spiral for me. When I first started mapping for Source, I was exploding with ideas that I couldn't fulfill due to my lack of skills. But that was what motivated me. By the time I actually started learning stuff, I gradually started becoming less and less motivated to start anything substantial. So I've basically flatlined.

For a while I was able to create small, novelty scenes to keep myself up to par for the most part, but even that doesn't work for me anymore.

Personally, I believe creativity is tied in with personal life. If you're not motivated or inspired in life, you aren't going to be creative either. I'm speaking from experience though.


@Jangalomph. I really liked that youtube video. Reminds me of the scene in Half-Life where the scientist gets dragged in to a vent and all you hear is him screaming and a nasty splatter, then all his guts spewing out the vent opening.

[Will_B]

Personally, I believe creativity is tied in with personal life. If you're not motivated or inspired in life, you aren't going to be creative either. I'm speaking from experience though.

I think you're on to something, since August last year I haven't exactly been having the best time, things have been quite tough personally and still are.

@Jangalomph - that's some nice stuff and an interesting idea to keep myself busy. Lately as I've said before I've set myself learning goals, mainly following tutorials but not exactly creating anything original. Perhaps I should move onto doing something like this instead.

[BaRRaKID]

Hey (yes, it's been a while, how is everyone doing?)
I've struggled with this a lot, and it's one of the reasons why I stopped mapping even though it's something that I love.
First thing you need to consider is that you may suffer from ADD (like almost everyone on the Internet). What worked for me (obviously didn't worked for LD but has helped me with my career as a programmer) was creating a relaxing and distraction free work environment. Get a simple desk, remove all distractions from your field of view like TV, games, music cds/mp3 player, etc. If you can afford it get a second computer and use one of them exclusively for working and the other for "playing", or at least create a second user profile with a different background and without shortcuts to any type of distractions, basically anything that helps you distinguish between work time and play time. I for example use a different keyboard layout in my work computer, you may try that as well. You may also consider turning of your phone and Internet if you don't need them for working. Its also very important to work in a comfortable environment, get a nice chair (your chair is the most important part of your work environment, don't be afraid of buying an expensive chair), make sure you don't work in the dark (it will mess up your eyes), position your screen properly, etc. If you feel any pain it will distract you from what you're doing.

Next try to show your work to others as soon as possible, peer pressure works great for keeping motivation up. It doesn't matter if people like your work or not, or if it's far from completion, just show it to people and use whatever they say as motivation. if they say it's bad try to make it better, if they say it's good keep up working as you did so far.

Also try to split the project into smaller tasks and reward yourself after completing each of those tasks, the bigger the task the bigger the reward should be (it's a bit like training a pet, but it works). If you want to buy a new game for example force yourself to wait until you've completed a part of whatever it is you're working on, take one or two days of rest and then move on to the next task. If you feel like redoing or changing an already completed task, don't! You need to know when to stop or you will never complete anything. If the change really is needed move it to the end of the "pile", only work on it after all the other tasks are done.

It's also a good idea to have side projects specially if they are personal projects not intended to be released, just something that you do for yourself. If you're getting tired of working on the same thing stop and do something smaller and different and wait until you've new ideas and motivation to work on your main project.

Your personal life will also affect your motivation, and that's the hardest thing to fix. My best advice is to avoid working after something problematic happens since it will turn your project into something that reminds you of that event. Wait a few days, do something else, try to get some fresh air and some exercise, and when you start feeling less depressed go back to your project.

And about being sad or depressed, if you've experienced something particularly traumatic or life changing recently, and that made you loose motivation, if you're having troubling sleeping or eating, are always sad, want to be alone a lot and avoid social interactions, or if you resort to alcohol or drugs to make you feel better you may really have a clinical depression and you should see a doctor. Depressions are serious. I've suffered from a depression for almost two years of my life and would probably still be depressed today if a friend didn't forced me to see a doctor.

Finally make sure that you enjoy what you do, if you've no passion for it you're just waisting time and you shouldn't be afraid to try something different until you find your real passion.

I hope this helps.

[Will_B]

Thank you BaRRaKID, that was a very informative and reassuring post. Its funny you mention work space arrangement and what your chair is like. My working arrangement sucks at the moment, too many distractions and clutter. My chair is also causing me a lot of pain, in my back, chest and neck. I will try fix these problems, I'm going to make myself a new desk and get myself a new chair.

What you also mentioned about personal life seems to be bang on what I'm struggling with now, I'm under constant stress from so many things, family, personal, future, that its becoming overwhelming. I cant focus on anything with all these worries, I'm 20 already (when i say that to people they usually say 'Only 20!?') and have no idea's for careers other than the video game industry, and if I haven't been enjoying making maps lately and feeling like im not creative enough, perhaps its not a passion after all? That's one of my hundreds of worries.

Thank you again for your time to help me.

[Jangalomph]

Just took your second account idea into play, I believe it'll give me some discipline.

As for motivation, I'd say the best motivator is to join a team that gives you things to do.

[Performante]

I like your idea of distinguishing work space from play space, BaRRaKID. Definitely something I could benefit from.

PS: Do you mind me asking how you recovered from your phase of desolation?

[nub]

I also like Barrakid's points. I've always wanted another system dedicated entirely to work. A nice, minimalistic, sleek looking setup with all the software I'd need on it.

And a really epic computer chair to support my pale ass.

[Jangalomph]

my Chair is basically a sheet of plywood now, i've compressed it so much.