why hello there

[Harrison Burton]

for some reason i couldn't create a portfolio but i have been browsing INTERLOPERS for a while now and just wanted to post some of my latest work and see if anyone has any constructive criticism or any ideas for more detail or anything that would improve the map

my name is Harrison Burton
i am 18
Love level design
have been mapping for 12 months
wish to work in the game industry

note i just started this map this week and it is still a pretty early WIP

[trcc]

Hi there! I'm going to be completly honest with you, I muted the music at 0:04. It's just painful to hear that kind of music (my opinion)

What game is this for? so_?!

[Harrison Burton]

this is for Situation Outbreak(MOD), on the source engine.

ya i love pantera and its the only music on my new comp so some people will have to mute >:D
but any constructive criticism?

[Harrison Burton]

no one has any ideas? constructive criticism?

[Major Banter]

Jesus fucking Christ man, this isn't Facepunch, calm down. Expect criticism over a period of a week while people think over your map and browse the forums. We all have lives here, expect us to critique when we have the time to!

Eesh. Newbies. Anyway, hi, and welcome to Interlopers, don't take that the wrong way.

Your laggy video hints at a very good map, but if you're after critiques of the actual aesthetics, screens are preferably. Evidently you've got a great deal of lighting skill but some gameplay options, i.e. walking on electrical wires don't really work for me. There's some excellent skybox work but I'm also seeing a map with few hints at where the player is meant to go, and some bizarre design, such as the extreme level of overgrowth that seems to be slapped on rather than forged into the environment. An example of this is your main street at 0:42, an amazing piece of work but the player doesn't get to go down there from what I see. On top of that, the lights are on, which is a bit odd for an abandoned city.

My suggestions are to reconsider your setting title, try to expand a little outside; the player looks very penned in at times, get it playtested plenty and keep your mouth shut while doing so (a mistake I often make, players won't have the designer telling them where to go on release) and finally continue to capitalise on your lighting skill; some of your indoor areas are lacklustre but brilliantly lit. Try to make them more interesting.

That seems harsh, but it'll help a lot I bet you. It's criticism and it's constructive. Carry on.

PS: You'd also be better to set your map in a generic abandoned city rather than Pripyat, Chernobyl, because it's so cliched; your ambience doesn't fit the bill either, nor your lighting.

Hope that helped and wasn't a harsh intro to the community!

[Phott]

If you want criticism, post in the "Under Construction" section, this isn't really the place people look to comment on other maps.

[Harrison Burton]

Jesus fucking Christ man, this isn't Facepunch, calm down. Expect criticism over a period of a week while people think over your map and browse the forums. We all have lives here, expect us to critique when we have the time to!

Eesh. Newbies. Anyway, hi, and welcome to Interlopers, don't take that the wrong way.

Your laggy video hints at a very good map, but if you're after critiques of the actual aesthetics, screens are preferably. Evidently you've got a great deal of lighting skill but some gameplay options, i.e. walking on electrical wires don't really work for me. There's some excellent skybox work but I'm also seeing a map with few hints at where the player is meant to go, and some bizarre design, such as the extreme level of overgrowth that seems to be slapped on rather than forged into the environment. An example of this is your main street at 0:42, an amazing piece of work but the player doesn't get to go down there from what I see. On top of that, the lights are on, which is a bit odd for an abandoned city.

My suggestions are to reconsider your setting title, try to expand a little outside; the player looks very penned in at times, get it playtested plenty and keep your mouth shut while doing so (a mistake I often make, players won't have the designer telling them where to go on release) and finally continue to capitalise on your lighting skill; some of your indoor areas are lacklustre but brilliantly lit. Try to make them more interesting.

That seems harsh, but it'll help a lot I bet you. It's criticism and it's constructive. Carry on.

PS: You'd also be better to set your map in a generic abandoned city rather than Pripyat, Chernobyl, because it's so cliched; your ambience doesn't fit the bill either, nor your lighting.

Hope that helped and wasn't a harsh intro to the community!

ok thank you
this map is a multilayer map where there are two teams and each team starts out in the apposing building.(so there are various ways across)
-the lighting inside the buildings has been deleted ( i have a previous version with night and color correction and that seamed to fit but forgot to take it out when i changed the setting)
-its also laggy from just my crappy recorder
-i aprecate the time you spent and will work on the points you brought to my attention.

ty

[Pwnd_Ja]

Welcome to Interlopers.
And don't mind Banter.
We typically keep him caged.

[Major Banter]

Mind out for the Pwnd_Ja guy, he's a real prick.